Life is at times a shipwreck, but during these times, we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. ~Voltaire
"cancer sucks" has played out as a theme on this blog before.
This past spring, it was my dad who lost his battle with colon cancer. In the Fall of ’06, it was Kate’s father-like figure Gord, who succumbed to a brief but valiant fight against a lymphoma. In the spring of ’06, it was my Granddad. Before that, it was Kate’s Grandmother. And that's just the past few years. I could go back further, or talk about other people I know dealing with the disease at the moment, if you like, but I think you get the picture.
In any case, it seems it’s now my moms' turn. Breast Cancer. British Columbia’s current catch phrase is ‘BC… the Best Place on Earth.’ Frankly, this is one BC we’d all like to stay the hell away from.
There is the particular sense about the situation that my mother is being kicked while she’s down; still mourning the loss of her husband, she’s now got to go through this garbage. One can’t help but look heavenward and say—either quietly to one’s self or out loud with fists shaking—ArE yOu SeRIouS?!
Luckily, mom has always taught us kids that though it may feel like it at times, God will never give us more than we can handle.
Listening to and watching mom in the past few weeks, I know she feels this within herself. She is approaching the situation with good humour and strength, determined that this will not bring her down. After all, she’s got a cruise boat to get on in June, and she’s got another grandkid arriving sometime in July, and she’ll be darned if she’s missing either.
And so, on February 19th, she’s going under the knife. She’s got the option of a lumpectomy, but she’s embraced the thought of a mastectomy instead.No sense giving the BC an increased chance to come back, and this way she wont need radiation. After surgery, she’ll have to wait for pathology results to see if any further chemo will be required. Hopefully doing away with the affected breast will take care of the problem, but if not…well, that’s a bridge that will be crossed if need be, but for now, we look to next week with optimism.
Really mom, this is only partly about letting others know so we can increase the prayer network for you. The main point is simply to say that in the face of all that you’ve faced in the past year, I am astounded at your continuing strength, and I am in awe of your ability to smile. You are simultaneously willing to play with the cards being dealt and conversely unwilling to put up with the crap the universe seems to be slinging in your direction. Dad is no doubt proud, as are we all, family and friends alike. You are an inspiration to us, and I only hope we can return the favour as you battle this cancer. Just keep singing in that lifeboat. We love you.
Some facts on breast cancer in Canada:
• One in nine women will develop breast cancer in her lifetime, assuming she lives to age 80
• Every year approximately 18,000 Canadian women develop breast cancer (over 2,000/year in B.C.)
• The BC Cancer Agency and the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation offer plenty of information and resources if you’re interested in learning more about breast cancer, or would like to donate to research.
16 comments:
I'm sorry to hear about all your family troubles dude.
I wish you mom well, and hope things turn out better.
love ya buddy
Stu, I am very sorry to hear about the battle your mom (and the rest of you and your family) is facing. I wish you and your family all the best and my thoughts will be with you. Stu I always get so much out of the words you write in your blog. Your words are so authentic. Your comparisons are so realistic and genuine. I so enjoy reading what you have to say. Thank you.
Hey Stu,
I'm so sorry to hear about your mum! We'll be thinking about your
family and sending out some positive vibes. Let us know if there is
anything we can do...
-t
Hi Stu,
As always, I enjoy reading your blog, both for its content and style. You really have a gift for writing.
Congratulations on your ‘lil peanut!! That’s fantastic news and I know it’ll be totally adored and loved like crazy J. It’s also great to hear your mom’s positive spirit through her cancer battle. My best friend’s mom made the same choice as your mom and didn’t need any chemo afterward. I believe the success rate is higher for women who opt for mastectomy rather than lumpectomy, plus I think it would alleviate the ‘what ifs’ of keeping the breast (at least for me it would).
I am sending your mom and family some healing thoughts. I know you’re aware of this already, but I don’t think it hurts to repeat: have her focus on a healthy diet and lifestyle, including exercise, and keep up the positive thoughts. The power of the mind is incredible! I was just at a lecture a few weeks ago and the recovery of cancer patients that ate organic and did some kind of exercise everyday, even walking, was significant.
Peace. Harmony. Laughter. Love
Jo \
"We love: that's why life is full of so many wonderful gifts." ~ Rumi
I agree with your thoughts on Cancer and your blog is very touching your Mom will be proud. Thanks for including me on you distribution list. Love Marion
Stu...I am soooo very sorry. Your mom sounds like a trooper though and I am sure she'll come through like a shining star.
I agree, cancer does suck - both my father (bladder) and my aunt (the BC too) had it and have come through just fine. Hopefully, the devil was caught early enough and human intervention & medicine will work it's magic. In case your mom wants to do 'other' things to help out - my father and my aunt read a book called "Foods That Fight Cancer". I have read it as well and it is a really great way to look at cancer and how you can eat to ward of the devil.
I wish your mom the best, and you and your family the strength to carry you through this tough time.
Jules
I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom's cancer, Stu. You can know that I will be praying for your family and for strength for her. Sending love, too, to your wee one...
Elizabeth
Hello Stu, I will be praying for your mothers safe and healthy recovery. Remeber, Cancer can be beaten!!
Jackie Humber
Hi Stu,
Been a while, eh?
Congratulations on your pending new arrival and I'm very sorry to hear about your Mom's breast cancer. HOWEVER:
I am essentially writing to let you know that my family went through a similar experience. My Baba was diagnosed with BC a few months ago and, like your Mom, opted to have a masectomy. We were all really worried, but guess what? This 79-year-old woman was up and about within DAYS of her surgery and we all had to yell at her to stop it and rest. :) She's doing absolutely fine now.
At any rate, I just wanted to pass that on to you as a sort of message of hope - here's hoping that your Mom does well in her surgery and can be cancer free! My thoughts are with you guys.
Best wishes,
Ang
Hey Stu,
Our thoughts are with you guys. And good luck beating this thing. Ya gotta believe.
Lotsa love
Pete
i am so sorry to hear this stu, your mom is in my thoughts.
So sorry to hear. You and Kate have been hit with some really sad news over the past years. My grandma just died in August of ovarian cancer and my uncle found out a couple of months ago that he has lymphoma. It seems as though this awful disease touches us all in some way or another. Stewart and I are thinking of you and if you guys ever need a break, come on over to Victoria and stay with us. Heather.
Stu,
We will be sure to keep your MOM in our prayers.
Linds and Family
Hey, Stu.
You *know* I'm praying for your mom. I love you guys very much, and am with you in this fight every step of the way.
Love,
Cuz Tara
Our thoughts our with your family. It seems difficult, but think of the positives and the universe will figure itself out.
Lauren and Peter
Stuart - I am so sorry to hear about your Mom - I will message her asap - best wishes to all and to you and your lovely wife as you await your new little person!
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